I was sitting in the bank waiting for the teller to call my number. We’d been there at least five minutes, and my two-year-old was bored. So I took out my phone and handed him Peppa Pig.
The man sitting beside me smiled, ’We didn’t have those when my boys were little,’ he said.
It wasn’t a criticism, just a friendly comment.
But I took it as a reminder. There are other ways to keep a child entertained.
And while there are reasons we often reach for the device first (we usually always have one, we know they work) they may not be the best choice for our children.
And here’s why:
Screens don’t provide an opportunity for language development. They are one-sided. They talk to the child, but they don’t give the child a chance to talk back.
Cartoon pigs also keep children perfectly still, which is the opposite of what they need for healthy development.
Finally, screens distract our children from the business of play. Part of the reason a toddler gets in trouble in the bank is they want to play with everything. They want to climb under the chairs and draw with the pens for writing cheques. And that play, which engages a child imagination and thinking is good for their brains.
When we give a child a screen, we shut off that process of learning.
But if not a screen then what? What can we pack to keep our children quiet and calm in the bank, at the cafe or in the doctors waiting room?
1. A Picture Book
Unlike a device, a book offers two-way communication. It encourages the child and parent to have a conversation. A high-quality picture book can facilitate hours of discussion. And books are like magic—they keep even the loudest children quiet.
2. A Ball
Who said you had to sit in a waiting room? If it’s not busy, there’s no reason you can’t find a corner and roll a ball together. Or maybe there’s a little patch of grass outside Dad’s work and those five minutes waiting for him to come out can become time for catching practice.
3. Coloured Pencils and Paper
Children love to draw and make marks on paper, and this activity helps them develop the skills they need to learn to read and write. Toddlers tend to do better with thicker crayons and pencils, but if you have a few in your bag, you’ll always have something for them to do.
4. A Soft Toy and a Muslin Wrap
Most of us have too many of these items at home. But one of each is a great thing to pack in the nappy bag. Children love wrapping and carrying their ‘baby’, a lovely quiet game that helps to develop a child’s language and empathy.
5. A Small Car (or Three)
A little collection of cars in a canvas bag provides hours of fun. Every place you visit is a new place to explore. There are patterns on the carpet and chairs to drive underneath. And another child might join in with this play, which will make it even more fun.
5. A Hat
Once you notice it, there is nature everywhere. There are grassy hills to roll down, fountains with water to splash in and trees dropping colourful leaves. If you have some simple sun protection, there is never a reason not to stop for a few minutes and play outside.
And sometimes a ten minute run around outside will help give your child exactly what they need to handle the wait in the bank.
I wish I could find that Dad and thank him for his comment. It’s changed the way I parent.
I now view those moments of boredom as opportunities—little snippets in our day for play, fun and connection.
Not worth giving up.
Parenting doesn’t have to be overwhelming, I’ll help you find a simpler way so you can deepen your connection with the ones you love. Sign up for my free course, or get my 1-2-3 newsletter in your inbox each week.
2/4/2019 07:00:16 am
I look back on the years my kids sat with me in church happily playing with small quiet toys, reading books to themselves, drawing and snacking. I would count off the "golden four " as I packed to go to any meeting etc the fact a screen was not an option in that setting was a great discipline for me. They weren't around for my eldest and I then I gave my youngest the gift of the alternative with lots of cuddles to boot. sometimes she'd just want a back scratch for 20 mins. like taking a cat out with you! 😊 I know it's harder for more high energy kids.
28/9/2022 02:16:48 am
Hi great readinng your blog
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Hi, I'm Hannah
I write about parenting, simplicity, nature and play.